The 5 Worst Kinds of After-School Pick-Up Drivers
Someday, after-school pick-up driving may become an Olympic sport. Many parents seem to already be training for the competition.
Here are the five worst kinds of after-school pick-up drivers.
After-school pick-up procedures vary widely by school. Some schools have vehicles form a line, while others have parents come indoors after parking.
No matter what the policy, there are always some trying to find a way to beat the system.
- 1
The Handicap Parking Spot Takers
I'm talking about the drivers who take handicap spots without a handicap license plate or temporary permit. They are the most selfish and lazy of the entire group.
Some of the Handicap Parking Spot Takers will argue that they have to take a handicap spot because it's all that's left...and that's part of their daily pick-up plan, arrive late and take a handicap spot.
Others will get there early and take a handicap spot. It doesn't matter if a non-handicap spot is open right next to it. These people are the worst of the worst.
- 2
The Drag Racers
They are always in a hurry.
Everybody has some days when you're in an extra hurry to get to another stop. You might have to get to a dentist appointment, practice or something else.
The Drag Racers are different. They never slow down. They are most commonly found in large SUVs featuring at least one travel sports window sticker, but they can be spotted driving any vehicle.
If you find a parking spot and one of the Drag Racers is behind you, you'd better pull into it quick, because they'll pass you to steal the spot.
- 3
The Early Arrivers
Everyone is busy which makes getting to after-school pick-up early a chore, but maybe once in a while you'll be able to arrive earlier than usual.
Think you'll be the first in line? No way.
The Early Arrivers have already beat you there.
It doesn't matter how soon you get to school, they'll always be in front of you. How early do they get there? Nobody knows. It is entirely possible that they live in the school cafeteria.
- 4
The Two-Trackers
The Two-Trackers are known for their general disregard for social norms. The paved parking lot is merely a suggestion to them. They will literally two-track across the muddy grass if it helps them get a better spot, but it's more than just that.
The Two-Trackers will make their own way wherever they can. They might even try to cut in line if given the chance.
- 5
The School Zone Tailgaters
The after-school pick-up driving adventure doesn't start or end on school property. In fact, you don't even have to pick up a kid to experience it. All you have to do is enter a school zone.
I used to think the School Zone Tailgaters were people who didn't have kids in school and didn't realize that they had entered a school zone. Now, I know better. Sometimes, it's the same people who are heading into or out of school.
The speed limit of 25 mph near schools at the end of the day doesn't last long and it's always clearly marked where it starts and ends. It may even be highlighted with flashing yellow lights, but none of that matters to the School Zone Tailgaters. They will enter the school zone above the regular speed limit and proceed to follow about five feet behind you if you dare to drive only 25 mph.